Wednesday, August 1, 2012

Ghosts



Exactly!

Ghosts can come in all forms.
 Some people believe that they are spirits from a past life trying to contact us.
Some people believe they are their loved ones who have passed on (I'd call those angels).
But for me.....ghosts are people/ things from the past that may or may not haunt us from time to time.
I don't mean that in some creepy paranormal activity kind of way.
I mean it in the sense of friends lost or activities we would like to forget kind of way.
Ex-boyfriends, former friends and even photos.
Yesterday I was surprised by a ghost from my past.
Although I really shouldn't have been. It was bound to happen.
A little back story - two years ago, two weeks before I was to walk down the aisle my 'friend' and 'neighbor' (I use that term loosely as she lived a few streets over) whom I has asked to be a bridesmaid suddenly backed out of the wedding.
Via text message.
You can read a brief snippet of that drama here.
Anywho even though we live in the same city I have never run into her since that incident.
Which is slightly odd because I seem to run into other folks (moms from the kids school, local neighbors etc.) all over the place around here!
But two years and no contact.
And then boom. 
Ran into her at swim lessons yesterday.
I guess I shouldn't say ran into, more like, saw from a few cars over and by the time I realized who it was we had already passed and were walking into the pool area.
You know how you do the 'hi. how're you doing" mom nod?
Well I did that without thinking while unloading the stroller and then it hit me as to who I just nodded at!
Crazy, I shook my head thinking that couldn't be right but when I looked up again I saw her little girl and knew it was.
Tres bizarre.
But I went about my business of getting Sweet Pea to the pool for her lesson.
Of course I immediately text my bff Ebony to tell her and we were both surprised.
I wasn't even sure if she recognized me although I don't see why not. Haven't changed that much in two years.
 Except my hair is longer. And I had a baby.
But I digress.
Today however, we rolled up to the pool a few minutes early and I know she saw me.
Looked right in my direction and then turned away.
I could feel her muscles tense up and as soon as her kids lesson was over she hightailed it out of there.
But I'm not surprised.
I wasn't expecting her to speak to me. 
I mean, I'm sure she feels as though I did something to her to warrant quitting the wedding in the first place just as I feel she bailed on me.
To each their own right?
I'm pretty much over what happened. Pretty much.....maybe still smarting a bit.
I can't lie. 
It sucked  the way it all came out but everything happens for a reason.
I'm no stranger to losing friends or severing ties but the way it all went down was a bit hurtful and a  blow to my ego.
In the last two years I have severed ties with my share of 'friends' simply because we had either out grown each other or there was drama that I didn't want to deal with.
I believe that's a real part of getting older and growing up.
I know who my true friends are and I think I had to let go of a few "associates" in order to make room for the tried and true.
I always want to maintain real quality friendships with my girls and in order to do that I don't need to have 25 close girlfriends.
It's simply not possibly at this stage in my life nor is it necessary.
So I let a few go. 
And in the process I've grown as have the friendships I chose to keep.
Back to swim lessons......I am not opposed to saying hello but I know the friendship is long over and that's cool.
It will be interesting to see if we ever do acknowledge each other over the next two weeks of lessons or if it becomes a game to see who can ignore who the hardest.


Has this ever happened to you?
Ever run into a ghost from your past?
How did you handle it?

1 comment:

  1. Oh GIRL do I have ghosts. Thankfully I live across the country from 95% of them, but I occasionally run into the ones I have here. Usually it's a lot of fake smiles and pretending they missed me loads and are just "too busy" to contact me. Mmmmhmmm.

    You are right, some friendships for one reason or another just don't need to go on.

    (Callie at Through Clouded Glass is talking about this some today! How interesting, maybe I'm about to run into one of my ghosts with all this being talked about at once!)

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