thats the best way to describe my emotions right now.
I am a complete mess and am just waiting for the breakdown.
I want to cry ALL the time.
these last few weeks have been really hard
since finding out that my grandma has been told she only has so long to live and coming to the realization that this may very well be the last year of her life and my little girl will not grow up knowing her the way I do is heartbreaking.
I have been pushing myself to the limit each day and its starting to take its toll
not only on me but my family as well.
my mother is hurting
my brother is too far away to 'be there' for her leaving myself and my aunt (her sister) and she's hurting as well......
and I don't.know.what.to.do.
other than pray
and believe me I have been on my knees daily!!!

I am having such a hard time keeping it together......

maybe I just need a good cry to get it all out?


  1. Cry my friend...sometimes, it's just what we need! I am so sorry to hear about your grandma...that is incredibly difficult news to get...hugs and prayers from me.

  2. Ah,honey. I'm so, so sorry about your grandma. Allow yourself to cry all YOU need to to get through this situation. But understand, and although I don't know her I'm fairly certain, your grandma is going to want you to celebrate her life, not mourn her situation. I'm praying for you and your family!


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