Thursday, January 28, 2010

it's so hard... to say goodbye...

I've been M.I.A for the last few days ( did you even notice?) as I posted this last week.
Well.....on Wednesday January 20th my Grandmother Mary L. Ross Larkins went to heaven.
At about 6am as I was finishing up my makeup to leave for work, my phone rang.
It was my mother.
I looked at it and knew.
I let it ring a few times before picking up and hearing the words I had been anticipating/dreading for weeks.
"Grandma's gone".
Immediately I burst into tears and then pulled it together to get to work on time.
I had a lot to do before I left.
at about 9am I received an email from a travel agent letting me know I had a 6am flight out the next morning.
Thank God for my Dad and my Aunt.
  We were able to meet each other in Atlanta and fly on to Ohio togethe.
 Under normal circumstances, going home to Ohio is always great fun.
I get to see family I haven't seen in years, some I've never met or don't remember meeting.
There are old family friends who tell me how much I look like my mother and all of my Aunts and Uncles.
But this time was different.
My Grandmother was the matriarch of  our family.
She is the only Grand I have/had.
To walk into her house and not hear her call out to me or come around the corner with arms out stretched was HARD.
All the familiar sights and smells, but no Grandma.
Not in the physical sense anyway.
Her spirit was EVERYWHERE though.
As I said here, she was a huge fan of angels and there was real heavenly host hanging out in her house.
I counted 16 angels in "my" bedroom alone.
There has to be at least 100+ in the house all-together.
and it was comforting to see them all and know that she is with them.
Our angel.
Watching over us all.
Being the wonderful woman she was she had everything prepared for her eventual passing - down to how long each person could speak at the funeral!
One of my aunts read Proverbs 31 - The Virtous Woman
and it was SO appropriate.
My grandmother was a living,breathing example to me and the rest of my cousins on how to be not just a lady,
but a woman of and for God.
And for that I am eternally grateful.
Even in her darkest, most painful moments she thanked God for giving her one more minute,
one more hour, one more day.
Not once did she complain.
Not once did she cry out and say "why me Lord?"
It's an example that I plan to learn from and and live by.
The last time I spoke to her she told me how much she loved me and I told her the same
and I find comfort in that.
She was:
Amazing
Mother
Magnificent
Funny
Friend
Charming
Kind
Loving
Grandmother
Supportive
Forgiving
Understanding
Wife

A Virtuous woman indeed.

***********************

I would also like to thank all those who have called, emailed, text or facebooked me their condolences.
it was such a blessing to receive such a marvelous out pouring of love from friends and even strangers alike.
I have been so blessed to have such loving family and friends.
thank you






1 comment:

  1. Oh..I am so, so sorry for your loss! I have loved reading your heart-felt posts about your Grandma and this one is no exception! She sounds like a lovely, special woman and will no doubt continue to live on through those who loved her. I will pray for your healing! =)
    Mindy
    www.thesuburbanlife.com

    ReplyDelete

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